I know it's a little late for new year's resolutions (and I had a couple lined up already, trust me) but so much happened in january and february that for some reason it's just now making sense what this year should really be about for me. In january I was busy having friction with new love, and by early february that new love and I had parted ways, along with my full-time job at the design firm I'd been with for almost exactly a year. (Mercury retrograde? Google it.) To my utter surprise, I actually felt more free than I had in a long time, sprinkled with a little confusion and dizziness of course. I felt extremely productive and a little high on the possibilities of abandon that I foresaw.

Long story short, I initially moved to north austin as a result of the opportunity for full-time, corporate "design" work. Turns out, I don't thrive in a corporate environment where I have little creative freedom, and had felt extremely stifled for so long that day to day life had become stale. This is not what I want for myself, and my attitude has completely changed from "money and security is what's most important" to "money and security mean nothing if I am not loving the process." I need something that I can have some influence in, something that's evolving and exciting for me.

Since then, some days have looked better than others, but I'm staying positive and I'm ready for a new journey - and a new city!

This is why I have new goals. So far they are:

1 // Watch (way) less tv. I've noticed that the spare moments of the daily grind I was stuck in revolved around tv shows, and it's become a creativity-sucking habit. Not gunna keep happening.

2 // Actually keep a journal. It's crazy in moments like this where you feel the need to do a complete 180 turnaround in life, you always end up asking yourself how in the world you got there. I'd like to be able to answer that question.

3 // Carve out time each morning to seek inspiration and be creative. I think a lot of people feel that they lose their creative capacity when they get older, but I really think it's a choice. And I think it's so important to keep alive, especially if you can't seem to fit into a corporate ideal. It takes practice though - baby steps!

4 // Find music I love. I've also found in the last couple years that I've lost the drive to see live shows and find new music I'm passionate about and can relate to. I keep listening to old, nostalgic records over and over. That's not me. Not okay.

[END RANT.]

x - J

Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5 ESV)

Recent Thoughts + Resolutions

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